How do you punctuate the following statement: A woman without her man is nothing. If we are a man we will probably punctuate that sentence thus: “A woman, without her man, is nothing.” In contrast, a woman will no doubt wish to punctuate the exact same sentence differently: “A woman: without her, man is nothing.” So, here is a little reminder from our own school days – punctuation is important! We must use the correct punctuation for the full meaning to be clearly understood.
If we ever had not appreciated that, we had probably not had to study the poetry of the American poet, ee cummings, as he famously did not use punctuation in his work. I still vividly recall with deep anguish being asked to read aloud in class one of his poems that began, “next to of course god america I / love you land of the pilgrims’ and so forth oh / say can you see by the dawn’s early my / country tis of centuries come and go” (I will stop there, before we are all totally confused)!
The opening sentence of the novel ‘The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy, Gentleman’ (by Laurence Sterne) certainly challenges our will to read novels! “I wish either my father or my mother, or indeed both of them, as they were in duty both equally bound to it, had minded what they were about when they begot me; had they duly consider’d how much depended upon what they were then doing;—that not only the production of a rational Being was concern’d in it, but that possibly the happy formation and temperature of his body, perhaps his genius and the very cast of his mind;— and, for aught they knew to the contrary, even the fortunes of his whole house might take their turn from the humours and dispositions which were then uppermost:—— Had they duly weighed and considered all this, and proceeded accordingly,——I am verily persuaded I should have made a quite different figure in the world, from that, in which the reader is likely to see me.” I suspect that many people will have skipped that bit and will certainly not put the book on their reading list!
Punctuation plays an important role in ensuring sense is made of what is written; furthermore, the correct punctuation is necessary. So now I come to my rather strange question: what punctuation mark would best describe the role parents play in their child’s life? At times they perhaps need to be a full stop, giving their child the opportunity to stop and think; at other times, maybe they are commas, just being there to give their child a moment to pause. Some parents might be question marks, constantly asking questions, while others might be exclamation marks, expressing great delight, excitement and enthusiasm in their child’s life.
Overall, though, maybe it is rather obvious: parents should be parent-heses. Parentheses (or brackets, if we have to look the word up) indicate that what is in them is not fundamental but rather have an explanatory or qualifying role, almost as an aside (or even as an after-thought). What is in them is not essential for understanding. A child’s life is not about the parent, as Tristram Shandy was trying to say, but the parent has to be nearby, providing some further input.
Like punctuation, parents are important but it is also important that they are in the right place and are used correctly. If they are not, then we find the opening statement (with a slight variation) has to be changed again: A child (without): her parent is nothing. Parents, let us stay in parentheses.
For further reflection on this subject, you may wish to read ‘Flight of Angels or Fight of Humans?’ at:
http://www.atschisz.co.zw/parents-articles/flight-of-angels-or-fight-of-humans/
TIM MIDDLETON, EXECUTIVE DIRECTOR, ATS